Update

Okay, I know it's been awhile since I have been on here sorry :(. Here's an update. Okay Jamar got in an car accident on last Thursday. He is okay know but his car did get total out. But the only thing that matter was he was okay and God brought him out of that. We spent like all night in the emergency room just for them to us he was okay and he could go home. Then he went to the hospital the day after and he has high blood pressure and an over-active thyroid. Now he is on medication for that and we need to watch our diet and what we eat. We resolved the communication problem and like I predicted it got turned around on me but he later on apologized for what he did. He realized what he did was wrong and that I was right kind of LOL. Other than that things have been cool. I only have like 3-4 weeks left of school YAY :). I am registering for 2 summer classes tomorrow I pray that they aren't filled yet or I am going to be highly pissed. I have been tying to register for weeks now and I had an appointment last week to do it. But the counselors had an emergency meeting or something so I don't know. Easter sunday was good spent some time with my dad's side, mom side, and my future husbands side. So everything balanced out pretty well. But I am just ready to be finished and have at least month of rest. I will try and start back writing everyday. Oh UGHHH I hate that my mother and her nosy ass friends are on facebook they really need to do something more with their life.

Communication

Okay we just had a conversation abut communication actually and arguement, but I guess that didn't register to him because here we go again today. Okay now Marc Jacobs had an grooming appointment for 2pm today and Jamar had an doctor appt for 1. 1:45 came around and I knew they weren't going to make it so I called petsmart and re-scheduled it for 4pm. He didnt make that one either because him and his mom were still at the doctor all the way in the city okay. I called petsmart back to re-schedule and they said it was too late and they didn't have any more appt's till tomorrow. So I start calling all around to get him an appt for today because he needed one badly and my mom wants to take him to her job tomorrow. Finally I get one for 5 at the Petco in Homewood. I call Jamar and let him know and he say's okay that's fine I said okay try and be here by 4:30 so we won't be late he say's okay we are on our way from the doc now. Okay 5 o'clock gets here still no jamar or even a phone call and I had been calling every 10 mintes. So finally I decided to call Petsmart and schedule him for early appt tomorrow and they like oh we already have Marc Jacobs here. How stupid do you think that made me feel and look. So I call Jamar and he finally picks up and oh yea me and my mom dropped him off and we left our phones in the car. Okay I can understan leaving the phones in the car but when you were on your way there why not call me and let me know so I could call Petco and let them know we will not be able to make it. And he knew I wanted to be apart of that but that didn't matter probably because I'm not paying for it right. Probably. So I ask why didnt you call me oh we left both of our phones in the car there was no communication once again. I just dont understand why I wasnt informed of where my dog was going to be at. But when he is with him and his mom its their dog not mine.But this will turn around and be my fault just watch and see for the conclusion.

It's Still Here.

Okay I have been sick since last Friday and it i now finally trying to go away but it's still here but it's not as bad as it was Thank God. And on the other hand the big fight that I had with my mom has gotten out of hand, and I want it to be over but if she is still going to act like a child then I dont really care. She walks around here doesn't speak or anything doesn't even acknowledge that I am in the same house as her, even the same room. But everything happens for a reason and I know that this is just a test from God and either we will overcome this or it will be this way until I move out. Even if we were to get over this it's still time for me to move out I don't feel that both of us can reside under the same roof and not get into another fight and the next one won't be as nice or good as the first one. And I guess she called herself telling her boyfriend who (well we will leave their dirt to them but can we say not smart) had an attitude towards me this morning so maybe it would be better if I just left the house for them. I don't want to feel like a prisoner in my own house. And I'm tired of not feeling loved by my own parent so maybe if I leave then she will realize what she will be missing.But the tension is still here. But me and Jamar got into an argument because he was over an hour late picking me up from class last night and not becasue he had class or anything but because he needed to play basketball for himself. But we got over that but I still feel like it's still here. That we tried to resolve it but something still isn't right I still feel a little distant to him. He told me that he will always be here and that everything will work out for the best. And he is still here. LOL. But I sent Marc Jacobs over his house until I started to feel better I just didnt have the strength to run after him and keep cleaning up after him when I was dead dog sick, oh yea she hasn't even asked me how was I feeling after I was up all night coughing and throwing up I mean dang can I get some kind of respect but I guess not I'm 19 and she doesnt have to care for me anymore it's not her job. Yea I need to finish my paper before class tonight. So until next time>!&^

JTE Smoochies Darling!!!!!

Everything always turns out for the best!

Okay yesterday went pretty good the only thing I woke up with a sore throat everything was swollen, but I had to go to one of my good friends Jessica Fashion Show at UIC which she killed I was proud of he even though qe arrived late but it still went well. But today wasn't good at all I missed class this morning because I wasn't feeling well at all, and then I got into a big argument with my mother and through out all of what happened I figured out its time to move out of this house and go out on my own. I know being in this house will not let me move on and be successful and I will not let anyone hold me back being from my mother to my father to my fiance'. And the fight was over money which they say is the "Root of all Evil." I just see a different side in her she is just mean like evil and I don't feel loved by her anymore and I know its not good to not feel loved by one of your own parents but I don't and i don't want to live under her roof anymore. So I am going to find me a good job that pays well enough so I can pay my half of the rent. We were going to wait until November to move in with each other but I think the sooner the better because he is having troubles at home and I am having troubles and it seems like the only time we are happy is when we are with each other so we are going to start aparment hunting for a 2 bedroom. But after the fight I cried myself to sleep and when i woke up I called my fiance' to come and get me and we spent some hours together before it was time for me to come home and now I feel all better and relaxed and that everything is going to be okay. And I know there are going to be demons that try to attack me and us but I just have to know to push through them and keep focused on what the goal is. I just can't stay in this house any longer and I know it might hurt my father but I hope he can see that it is for the best and that I'm not trying to hurt him in anyway and that I will always love him the most. I know it might sound harsh and evil to say that but if you only knew what I have been going through for the past couple of years you would feel the same way. And I have the best fiance' he gave me a wonderful massage after eating and watching The Knowing (horrible), and I really needed it. Love, Live, Be Happy!!!
JTE

Bad to Good

Okay my day didn't start off to well I got up at 9 to go to chemistry. Got assigned a take home quiz and we just turned one in and I have homework in the class. Then I went to go and regiter for summer classes and they say I have to make an appointment not for tomorrow but for next week so that sucks and then the class I want might be filled by then and I will be highly ticked off. My dad was late picking me up, oh I can't drive because my license is still suspended but only til next monday the 6th hopefully. So came home and had to clean the house because it smelled like dog and my dog is really going craz he is only like 12 or 13 weeks and he is bad and he is teething on top of that. So me and his father go through hell and my mom because he wants to chew on EVERYTHING, so i cleaned then Jamar came over (Thats my fiance' for future reference no ring yet :(), and helped me take down my sew-in because my aunt is going to do it tomorrow for 50 dollars so now it looks a mess and it took us like 2 hours to take it down and i was hungry and tired and just wanted to eat. So we went to bakers square and we got into like 10 arguments and they were over nothing so that upset me but then we made up like we always do and my day ended great. Now I'm waiting for him to get out of class thank God i don't have night class tonight.

Smoochies JTE